


beyond your reaches

by midnightblues (sundayverny)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst, How Do I Tag, Komori Motoya - Freeform, M/M, Mentions of Osamu, Post-Break Up, Sakusa Kiyoomi-centric, The Author Regrets Everything, alt summary: kiyoomi comes home and regrets everything, i love u skts, peep at the side sunaosa, suna rintarou - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-03-11
Updated: 2021-03-11
Packaged: 2021-03-18 02:36:14
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,213
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29976108
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sundayverny/pseuds/midnightblues
Summary: kiyoomi is back home after a year of leaving everything behind. and everything starts catching up to him. and by 'everything' means miya atsumu.
Relationships: Miya Atsumu/Sakusa Kiyoomi
Comments: 3
Kudos: 30
Collections: SakuAtsuAngstWeek





	beyond your reaches

**Author's Note:**

> hi, i wasn't supposed to write for this day (day 1 - post-breakup/goodbye) for sakuatsu angst week ... but here i am and wrote this on a whim. 
> 
> title's inspired by taylor swift's champagne problems. (also the reason why i came up with this... fic. lol) don't know where i'm going with this, but I've always wanted to write skts, and now here's my first ever skts fic. aaaaaaa
> 
> enjoy reading! happy sakuatsu angst week!

Kiyoomi sits with discomfort on his train ride from the city. He was supposed to be feeling refreshed after meeting with Suna. He needed to see a friend, especially after being away for a year.

But why did it seem that life's starting to weigh in on him now? _Again_? He was doing great, after leaving everything behind and focusing on what matters in his life. but why was he feeling this way? 

Kiyoomi starts to backtrack on the catching-up conversation with the friend.

“ _As for everyone… everyone's doing great!_ " Suna started to spill, excited to tell how most of the friends he's left have been doing. Kiyoomi hasn't been really good with catching up in long-distance, and he's glad Suna's there to tell him stories and stuff he missed being away.

" _-oh, yeah! how could I forget? Atsumu's holding up well too. Actually, even better now compared to when you left him…"_ Ah, yes. This emotion of guilt and hurt hugging him in this cold ride home started when Suna mentioned _his_ name.

Now Kiyoomi regrets telling him 'tell me everything' sitting down in that café with him. He doesn't want to hear about everything. There's something - someone - he doesn't want to hear about.

Kiyoomi just doesn’t want to be reminded of his own mistakes and how they had affected people around him; how they had affected someone who he truly cared about.

“ _Wait, it’s okay, right?_ ” Suna paused and asked him for permission to talk more. A silent nod was all he did, and just like that, Kiyoomi has begun to wreck himself again.

So Suna had started talking about _him_.

“ _God, that day was already ages ago, but I couldn’t forget it. I remember being at Osamu’s flat for the night, around 11 pm and Atsumu called me._ ”

Kiyoomi’s friend proceeded to recall that heartbreaking night. How Atsumu called Suna in the middle of the night after Kiyoomi told him he’s leaving and he's breaking up with him. According to Suna, he was the next best person to call after Osamu. His twin was sleeping soundly, and Suna was woken up by Osamu’s phone vibrating on the bed. And then the next one was his that rang, so he picked it up.

“ _I asked him where he was. He said he was taking the train to Osamu’s from your place. And it was pretty unusual for him to call that night, sounding so serious and - and sad. So I asked him if he was okay._ ”

Then Suna told him the details of that evening: how Atsumu just broke down in tears on the call, not answering his question. So Suna told him to just wait for them at the train stop to fetch him.

Kiyoomi hugs himself on his seat, eyes trailed down on the floor, trying to stop the conversation playing over and over on his head, now attached with the memories from that evening. His chest grows heavy, lump starting to form on his throat.

_Why did I have to hear the details of that night? Of what happened to him?_

He tries to brush it off his mind because it’s so long ago. It’s more than a year now, and he’s good. Kiyoomi has already said goodbye to that part of his life. It’s done. It’s over.

Fortunately, the train helps him to wake his mind from the horrible nightmare that catching up with Suna has brought him. His train stops at a familiar place, reminding him that it’s had been a while since he came home.

Kiyoomi puts on a mental reminder of why he’s back in Tokyo in the first place. It’s because of his cousin Komori. He’s holding a party and he heard Kiyoomi’s back in town together with his parents from abroad, and Komori being Komori, he just had to nag Kiyoomi to attend.

Suna was coming too, as he had mentioned earlier in the cafe, but he’s just gonna catch another ride going to Komori’s party venue, going along with some mutual friends.

When Kiyoomi finally reached the place, it was already packed. He’s seeing some familiar faces from high school and the volleyball team. He first searches for Komori, who suddenly appears out of nowhere from behind.

“Well, well well. If it isn’t Sakusa…”

“Motoya,” Kiyoomi deadpans.

“C’mon man! Give me a hug!” Komori tells him, reaching for it, and pulls him close. “Happy birthday, dude.”

“Thanks, Kiyo.” His cousin flashes a grin, holding up a glass filled with liquor. “I’m really glad you came.”

Kiyoomi shrugs. “Same… I guess?” He looks around, finding someone to talk to. Perhaps, another familiar face to talk to.

“Alright, drinks at the other end of the hall. If you need to fill up your stomach first, the food’s near the kitchen,” Komori tells him, seeing some close friend enter the area. “I’ll leave you now, Kiyo. I’ll catch up with you later!” Two taps on his shoulder and his cousin’s gone from his sight.

Kiyoomi finally sets his eyes on the bar at the end of the room and goes for it. He greets some of Komori’s friends that he’s passed by and some relatives around.

The man behind the counter immediately hands him a glass, and he takes it, and takes a gulp, wanting the painful memories gone in his head. ‘Shouldn’t have met up with Suna in the first place,’ he grumbles internally as he takes another sip of his drink.

His eyes wander the area again, leaning against the bar counter, hiding his mouth on his glass. A figure not too far away from where he’s standing.

A tall man with blonde hair. _It can’t be him_ , Kiyoomi whispers to himself. He couldn’t see the man properly in this lighting but he looks away and convinces himself that it isn’t him.

It can’t be Atsumu, right? It _shouldn’t_ be.

From the corner of his eyes, he could see the man moving closer, walking towards the bar.

“It’s not him,” Kiyoomi repeatedly tells himself, trying to mind his drink. _It’s not him. It’s not him. It’s not him. It’s not him. It’s not him. It’s not hi-_

“Omi,” a voice says beside him. Kiyoomi turns to the man beside him, while the bartender is pouring him another drink.

Tall man. Blonde hair. _Yep_. It _is_ Atsumu. Of course, it's him. And of course, Komori's friends with this man. Of course, he's invited.

Kiyoomi notices how his hair has grown long and how his body has grown more buff than the last time he had seen him.

Atsumu offers him a wide smile and then says 'thank you' to the man who had poured him a drink.

 _What am I supposed to say?_ Kiyoomi asks himself.

"Didn't think I'd see you here, Omi. No one told me you're back home," Atsumu tells him, leaving him no second to speak up. "But I'm glad you're here."

There's something with Atsumu's tone that's not sitting well with him. It's too _him_. Kiyoomi couldn't explain it, but it's way too kind. Too friendly, even.

Kiyoomi thinks he doesn't deserve this treatment from him - this way with how he's talking to him right now with so much ease. He doesn't deserve it. Not when he broke his heart.

Kiyoomi keeps his silence, just blinking back at him. He's trying to form words, but his mouth doesn't utter anything.

"Wanna get some air?" Atsumu asks, eyes darting to the open door towards a nearby balcony.

Kiyoomi nods and Atsumu starts walking to the balcony, squeezing through the growing crowd of the party.

Before he follows, he gulps every drop from his drink and asks for another drink from the bar.

When Kiyoomi reaches the balcony, he finds Atsumu near the balustrade with his own glass of liquor, looking out at the city lights.

When he senses Kiyoomi step into the space, he immediately turns to him with a warm smile. "Beautiful, isn't it?" He looks back at the wide city in front of him, blinking with lights of cars passing by from afar, and lampposts lighting up each street corner. "You've always loved this sight," Atsumu adds.

Kiyoomi lets out an exhale, wanting to put the weight off his chest, but nothing happens. He keeps quite a distance from Atsumu and takes another sip from his drink. And smiles, a fake chuckle coming out from his throat shakily.

"Atsumu," Kiyoomi calls. The first time he does after a year.

The man smiles at his call. "Omi."

"I'm - I'm glad to see you," he finally tells Atsumu.

Atsumu scoffs jokingly and then asks him. "How've you been, Omi?"

"Just fine." Truly, Kiyoomi's okay. Totally.

However, Atsumu can sense that he isn't. Of course, he knows. Even after a year, he still knows Kiyoomi. Even with just a slight change in his expression, Atsumu can already tell what it is.

But he lets Kiyoomi be and asks more. "So, back home huh? Just for Komori?"

Kiyoomi nods as a reply, humming. Another sip from his glass. "My parents let me tag along too… Wouldn't hurt me to attend _the_ cousin's birthday as well, so here I am."

"Ah." Atsumu drinks from his glass and observes Kiyoomi carefully, who's busy watching the city lights. He's finally calmed himself now from the looks of it.

"Omi," Atsumu calls him again. He looks back at the boy with a smile softer than earlier. He's glad to see him like this, Kiyoomi thought to himself, even though in reality he shouldn't be.

"You should stop pretending now," his ex says. The blonde boy brings his eyes back to the night view. 

"Huh?"

"You should stop pretending now, Omi. As if you're sorry for what you've done to me. You should forget about it now. It's all in the past," Atsumu adds, and the lump on his throat is back again.

Kiyoomi suddenly wishes he didn't attend the party.

"C'mon, Omi!" Atsumu chuckles, trying to lighten up the mood. He bumps his shoulder against Kiyoomi's. "We're still friends, right? And stop acting like I'm a ghost. Don't worry, I'm all over it! I'm sure you are too."

_Sure._

"Of course," Kiyoomi mutters as he fakes another nervous laugh. "Just thought you were mad at me. Well, actually you should because-"

"Because you broke my heart? Pfft. That's _so_ long ago," Atsumu tells him as if it was some sick joke ages ago. Kiyoomi watches his face; watches how Atsumu can talk about it so lightly.

He feels even horrible with how he's standing here with all the memories haunting him.

Kiyoomi remembers how he easily told Atsumu that he's leaving the team to focus on more important matters such as his education, and how he's ending it with him. He can vividly hear Atsumu's pleads and wanting to make it work even if they're going to be in different places.

He clearly remembers how he just walked away. Not even comforting Atsumu and saying beautiful words. He didn't even bother thanking him for being the light of his life for the past years - for how Atsumu easily changed his life, given the fact that he's not one with going through the motions, yet there he was. There he was that night, changing the course of that one thing in his life that he didn't want to alter at all.

"Yes, it's been more than a year now." Kiyoomi laughs again, bitterly, at himself for letting it all go.

For letting Atsumu go. Just like that.

"Atsu!" A voice from the door calls. Kiyoomi's seen him before. He remembers Atsumu introducing them together before. It's Atsumu's friend from his hometown.

Atsumu whips his head in the door's direction, and Kiyoomi sees a glint of love in his ex's eyes - something he's seen before.

"We're heading now! I didn't want to go yet but Aran said he's already waiting for us downstairs to drive us home. You good?"

"Yes, bub. Gimme a few secs."

The boy disappears from the door without greeting Kiyoomi, while Atsumu turns to him. "Well, then. This is goodbye, Omi. Have to go home. I promised Komori I'll stop by for a bit, I still have some plans with other friends…"

Kiyoomi nods as Atsumu pulls him in for a hug. "It's really nice seeing you tonight."

"Ditto."

Atsumu smiled at him again as he pulled away. "I hope this is not the last time we see each other."

"I hope so," Kiyoomi mumbles, smiling at him too.

"If you need company, just find Suna or Osamu. I think they just arrived."

"I probably will."

"Take care, Omi-omi." The endearment further breaks him inside. _I miss it_ , he admits to himself.

"You too, 'Tsumu." Atsumu grins wider at the endearment. Normally, it makes him stay longer. But Atsumu just holds Kiyoomi's hand and squeezes it.

One. Two. Three. "Bye, Omi. Gotta go now. See you around."

He slightly pulls Omi from there and then he lets go, smiling, and then pauses in the doorway to take one last look at Kiyoomi.

"Goodbye, Atsumu," Kiyoomi bids though the man has finally walked away.

Kiyoomi repeats _goodbye_ in his head, but he doesn't let go. A year has passed, but he _hasn't_ let go yet.

**Author's Note:**

> ...so there's /that/. hope you liked it!
> 
> if anyone wants to chat, I'm at twitter: @krknist! :)


End file.
